What did one ear say to the other?
'I didn't realize we lived on the same block.'

A man was standing by the rail of a ship on a particularly rough crossing. One of the ship's stewards passed by. 'Shall I serve you dinner in your cabin?' he asked.
'No,' groaned the man. 'Just throw it overboard, it'll save me the trouble.'

How do you turn ants into undies?
Put a P in front of them.

What's another name for a pair of knickers?
Two policemen.

What did the crew of the sailing boat do when they became becalmed?
Ate lots of baked beans.

Has the bottom fallen out of your world?
Eat prunes, and the world will fall out of your bottom.

What do you get if you pull your knickers up to your armpits?
A chest of drawers.

Which famous artist had both an inside and an outside lavatory?
Toulouse Lautrec.

What's the best place to have the school sickroom?
Next to the canteen!

Why did Donald's rugby team always win?
Because their socks smelt so bad no one dared tackle them.