Lara: Why was you dad thrown out of the council meeting?
Zara: He passed the wrong sort of motion!

Mother: What would you say if I made a smell like that?
Son: I’d be too polite to mention it!

What is long and pointy and runs in families?
Noses!

Lara: Your tights are all wrinkled
Zara: But I’m not wearing any!

Son, you smell like a pig! You know what a pig is?
Yes Dad, the son of a hog!

Husband: Will you still love me when I’m old, smelly and ugly?
Wife: Of course I do!

Lara: What does your brother do when he wears his pants out?
Zara: Wears them back in again!

What does your husband do for a living?
He’s a pig farmer
I thought that he had a certain air about him!

Mother: Do you realize that we have been in Paris for the whole weekend and haven’t visited the Louvre yet?
Father: I do, I expect it’s the different food we’re eating here!

Mother: What a filthy mess you look Lara!
Lara: Sorry mum, I slipped and fell in a cow pat.
Mother: What, in your brand new jacket!
Lara: Well I didn’t get time to change!