Did you hear about the dog who lived on garlic?
His bark was worse than his bite!

My dog's so lazy.
Why do you say that?
Yesterday I was watering the garden and he never lifted a leg to help me!

What do you get if you cross a rug and an elephant?
A large pile on the floor!

What did Tex say when his hound ran under a truck?
'Doggone.'

Why do you call your dog Carpenter?
He keeps doing little jobs around the house!

Why do you call your cat Rain?
He keeps leaving puddles everywhere!

What happened when the dog ran off with the skeleton's bones?
He didn't have a leg to stand on.

What’s invisible and stinks of carrots?
Rabbits breaking wind!

What do you get if you cross a canary and a seagull?
A bird that makes a mess on your head and then apologies!

Why couldn’t cavemen hear a pterodactyl go to the toilet?
Because it has a silent “p”!